Funny Post

Every where I go, people call me as the humorous guy, the ‘king of one-liners’, the person with a quick humorous repartee.
So I thought I will put together a collection of those that I quickly made up.
So here goes …………..

I was invited to propose the toast at the silver wedding anniversary of an uncle of mine. I started with “Marriages are made in heaven, but thereafter life is hell ………”
I woke up 3 hours later in the hospital.
People tell me I was struck on the head by a flying object that was hurled at me by someone in the crowd. I have a strange feeling there is a connection between my losing consciousness, the flying object and my wife.
Then I slowly turned around and to my surprise, saw my uncle in the bed next to mine. Apparently he had nodded in agreement and smiled at my opening line!

We started our work 1 hour late today, thanks to a health talk that we had yesterday. The speaker extolled us on the benefits of a simple thing like taking the stairs as opposed to taking the elevator. As a result, we had our employees taking the stairs and when they finally reached, huffing and puffing, they were in no state to work. They had to rest for half an hour before they were in any state to support themselves on the chair. Thank God we are located on the 5th floor.

We have all been lured by “Buy this, take that free”. Many times the FREE stuff troubles us more …………….Get married! You get the Mother-in-law free!!

And here is a one liner that I made up - “Never let an opportunity go by, it is just like lightning-never strikes twice at the same place” – Sunil King

More later!!