Sunday, May 17, 2009

Art of Control

I remember a scene from an English Movie where a plane is being hijacked!
The hijackers walk into the cockpit and ask the Pilots "who's in Charge"
one of them replies(unaware that they are hijackers) "I am".
then one of the hijackers puts a gun to his head and asks "now who's in charge"
The bewildered pilot replies "You are!"........

This set me thinking on the types of Control that humans exercise and i have classified some of them

Control by Manipulation
Control by Authority
Control by Selfless Giving

* Control by Manipulation - is exercised by manipulating people because of circumstances
or situation. Some politicians, Godmen, Cult Leaders or so called strategists exercise this kind of
control. They usually have a mass following by preaching and appealing to the emotional
quadrant. They manipulate the minds of people and control them.

* Control by Authority - This kind of control is exercised by people who have authority or power vested in them by some one higher(the government, education or economic status).
People can enjoy and exercise this control either because they have earned it or it is bestowed on them. People can control others because they are experts in a particular subject (SME) or because they have more economic power that helps them control other people's decisions (sometimes arm twisting).
There is a thin line in this form of control between positive Authority and negative authority.

* Control by Selfless Giving - This i feel is the best form of Control, always exercised when you have something on offer without expecting anything in return. A few examples are Helping those in distress, Counselling, community service etc.
There are people I know who are doing a wonderful job by helping people, counselling them, saving peoples' lives,saving marriages. These people too have a following of people who love them and trust them.
This is a very subtle form where you Control by not Controlling.
It would really help us if we exercise this form in our relationships.

All of us like to say "Dont worry, I'm in Control". But are we?
if yes, then what kind of control?

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